My group thought this was pretty cool, so I thought I would share it with the world ;)

CREATE PROCEDURE _fooUpd (
    @Param1 INT = NULL OUTPUT,
    @Param2 INT = NULL OUTPUT,
    @PK INT
)
AS
BEGIN
    UPDATE dbo.foo SET
        @Param1 = Col1,
        @Param2 = Col2,
        Retreived = Retreived + 1
    WHERE PK = @PK
END

The idea is to perform the parameter population, and the update with the same “hit” to the table.  The alternative is an UPDATE follwed by a SELECT...  Some purists might argue that this is hard to read... I do not agree with that, but I thought I would take the wind out of there sails ;)  Sorry, this trick does not work for SELECT statements.  You have to select all columns into variables, or return rowsets :(